A Wedding dance with my father on June 11, 1989

If I am a pro at waltzing through complex relationships, I learned that life skill from my most primal relationship – my father. Like me, the man himself was complicated, a tangled mass of contradictions.

For many years Father’s Day itself was a complicated holiday. Walking into a card shop with their rows upon rows of saccharine Hallmarks cards made me uneasy. For years I just danced around the idea of celebrating a special Father’s Day.

There was even a period when the idea of dancing with my father at my wedding seemed improbable.

But in time I accepted that seemingly conflicting feelings could all coexist, neither good nor bad canceling out the other. In the last few decades, there was acceptance and bonding creating a  close relationship. And gratitude for all I learned from him-his sharp wit, resiliency, and upbeat optimism was his gift to me, as was his generosity of spirit, intellectual curiosity, and sense of fun.

And my father, the consummate marathon runner was one smooth dancer!