“Nobody gets more gold stars than I do, believe me,” Donald Trump boasted after scoring high on his mental acuity test.
A huge sigh of relief could be heard from coast to coast after Trump easily aced his cognitive assessment test with perfect scores. Finally Americans can stop worrying that our president is unfit to be anywhere near the nuclear codes.
Dr Ronny Jackson, little Donnie’s pediatrician, er…physician assured the concerned public that the Presidents “has absolutely no cognitive or mental issues whatsoever.”
In fact the doubting doctor didn’t even think the tests were necessary in the first place, but a determined Donald insisted and specifically asked for a cognitive ability exam.
But forget the Montreal Cognitive Assessment test they want you to believe he took. The real test he took looks suspiciously familiar.
The strenuous and challenging battery of tests divided into executive functions, memory, language, attention and concentration, stresses language development , emphasizing visual discrimination, eye and hand coordination, and thinking skills.
With crayon and pencil in hand a confident Donnie was able to complete the test in record-breaking time.
Here’s the proof:
Donald showed excellent skills when it came to distinguishing differences in color.
Trump’s sharp motor skills and eye hand coordination were extraordinary for a man his age.
Memory and Language
Donald exhibited strong command of language proving what Trump has long pointed out, he has the best words. Now we can see for ourselves.
Attention and Concentration
Trumps ability to concentrate and comprehend logic and consequences should help relieve Americans who fret our President is unfit to be anywhere near the nuclear codes.
His skills at seeing differences is unparalleled.
No Gold Stars
The one test Donnie was unable to complete due to the apparent complex nature of the problem was not revealed to the public until now.
It must be noted that when it comes to reading and comprehension, Donald did not score well at all and completely glossed over this exercise.
It was as if he did not care or was unable to grasp the facts.
Copyright (©) 2018 Sally Edelstein
Since the 1700’s there are many, many recorded farses of manufactured ignorance or in this case, DEPENDENT or PARTIAL biased studies. Here are just a few:
• Tobacco, Tobacco Diseases, and Doubt — from 1950’s thru 1990’s the tobacoo industry launched major highly-funded “Doubt Campaigns” on scientific-medical group studies urging non-smoking.
• VIOXX and Merck — health professionals were finding fatal risks of heart diseases with Merck’s new blockbuster drug rofecoxib! Four years later after the pain-relief drug was introduced to consumers, due to Merck’s HEAVY funded campaign of “uncertainty,” it was removed from store shelves, BUT worse Merck knew about these fatalities caused by their drug.
• Beryllium — OSHA and the DOEnergy were constantly misinformed by the Defense Department and funding-PR work by Brush-Wellman (now Materion Corp) the leading U.S. producer of beryllium products, that CBD-exposure was below hazard-standards and sporadic. U.S. weapons manufacturers today dominate the beryllium market at more than 87% share of the world output.
And most importantly and relative here…
• Heavy Funding Effects and BPA — When there is a close correlation between the desired results of a study by a study’s funders and the reported results of that study, it is called the funding effect. Bisphenol A, an environmental estrogen used in polycarbonate plastic found in canned foods and dental sealants, exposure to low doses of the poly-plastic was found to alter human endocrine functions. The American Plastics Council (member corporations heavily vested in manufacturing plastics) employed the services of the Harvard Center for Risk Analysis to dispute the reports and found that the effects of BPA exposure were inconclusive. It was later found that the Harvard Risk Analysis study was extremely biased in their methods due to the APC funding.
Question for Mr. tRump: Will you have a panel of INDEPENDENT doctors of psychiatry and psychology perform these “cognitive tests” on you? Not the ones under your direct authority to fire!? Hahahahahaha!!! 🤣
I’m betting your test is quite a bit more difficult that the one they give around here. If you can draw a clock face and put the hands on the correct numbers and remember the names of three items, you pass this one. The “doctor” wants to be sure he gets to collect his navy retirement pay when this assignment is over. Who else but the sitting president/Commander in Chief can chose his own doctor and give him orders (which must be obeyed) to reassure the public?
I suspect my test was a bit more challenging. His dubious weight was not the only altered fact.
Oh! I remember doing all of these in the 1960-s and 1970s. Thanks for the reminder–and I can’t comment on his sanity or decency, except what one can read in my unspoken comments on them!
Thanks for a much needed laugh. I notice little Donnie did not do so well on following instructions (underline, make an X) when it came to “choosing the right words.” Not surprising, really.
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Little Donnie does what little Donnie feels like.
Thanks–this made me laugh. Also took me back to 1st grade. Fun 🙂
Glad you enjoyed it
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